This shall be my last post for this trip. Before the tears well up in your eyes just think what a load of crap I normally write, and that you reading my blog each week for over 28 weeks during work hours (we all know you have been) has probably cost your company a fair amount through unproductive work time. Now I whole heartedly approve of this, what is life without pointless websites you can access whilst at work, however I'm sure your company does not feel the same. Because of this, from now on I take personal credit for the mysterious increase in productivity in your office of at least 30 mins per week now that I have given up writing this rubbish.
There is of course one exception to this being the last post and that will be if something amusing and unfortunate happens to me in the next few weeks that will make you all smile. Of course I hope this isn't the case but I'm a team player and always happy to break up your next Monday morning with a final chuckle about how some misfortune has come my way. We shall see.
The situation as it stands is a tricky one. I have now whittled my options for returning to Europe down to two. I either catch this cargo boat, which means I will probably end up on the back of a 1982 Toyota Hilux somewhere in Sierra Leon for a few weeks polishing the militias large caliber machine gun, fun yes but work would never believe that one when I turn up 2 months late. The second option is to sell the bike here. A filthy thought I know, but being financially embarrassed as I most certainly have come to be, it has to be considered. I have 2 days to make my mind up so any intelligent thoughts on why I shouldn't sell would be worth hearing now as I need some guidance on this matter. If I do end up selling it will not be easy and frankly I may be even more distressed than when my pet hamster committed suicide by hanging. (another story, it hurts to remember) But money is money and I need some fast so I must forget my sentimental side as well as the images of Peanuts hanging from his wheel and man up. On the 3rd of Jan I shall have decided.
Anyway, back to the point which is the trip back north the Buenos Aires where I find myself now. Crimbo in Ushuaia was fun, but camping was not. I was very sick of it by then. Also I knew I should have worked harder at my German when I was at school as I was one of very few who didn't know how long a boiled sausage should be cooked for and also one of the few who couldn't speak the lingo, personally I blame the fact that I forgot what apple-juice was in my GCSE oral. Anyhow I survived as they all spoke very good English. We ate lots of food thanks to a master chef from Holland and I tried my best to fly the English flag by drinking as much as possible.
Apart from the Christmas fun I also rode to the final sign at the end of ruta 3. Got the pics done and rode back again. During my time in Ushuaia I met some great people with many different stories from dodgy places round the globe. Always great to hear, and fun to meet others with the same interests.
Finally after 5 days enough was enough, so me and the Welsh contingent I had met there headed off on the 26th to get to BA for new years. The was by far the classiest motorcade formed for quite a while as it consisted of not one but two KLR650s. We must have been the envy of all the, eeerr well Llamas and Emu on the way back, as thats all there was. There was one amusing moment at the border coming back into Argentina where the guard clearly wanted a bribe after spending too much on his nagging wife over Christmas so demanded I show him my insurance. Yeah right, insurance, of course I have it, was my response really hoping he would say, OK, great now you can go. Instead he demanded to see it. I went out to my bike pretending to get it, but really not having any clue what to do.
Finally I found a letter in English that looked no more official than a piece of junk mail. I took it in and as confident as I could be handed it to him. It had no evidence of being related to me or my bike or in fact insurance, but I just preyed he couldn't read English. After 5 Min's of scanning the letter as if he was some Oxford Scholar he says to me, `is the really your insurance?`, `yes of course it is` I say trying not to sweat on his nice polished desk. He then goes and asked a few more police, but lucky for me the only English they know is the word bribe, so he had to accept it. He wasn't best pleased at all. but after I got a bit stroppy with him and told him he had to give me the stamp as I had insurance the job was done. Quality blag!
Once again I was committed to riding silly distances to get to BA in 5 days. Clearly we managed it, and even got to see the Welsh Colony on the way which I must admit I really quite enjoyed. I even sampled a cup of fine tea and some Welsh cakes at some posh tea room. Still I'm not quite sure why they advertise Welsh tea as a specialty as I have not come across the rumor that the Welsh are famous for tea before, and nor had my Welsh friend, but hey there we go. The tea was good and the cakes were even better.
I wish there was more to say about riding up Ruta 3 to BA but frankly it was duller than... eeerr, well its duller than sitting at a desk for 8 hrs a day, 5 days a week pretending you have an important job to do, whilst instead reading travel blogs, but anyway there were more Emu and Llamas to see, and in fact we came across one llama that had got into a fight with a car, and clearly lost as it was dead, but I'm pretty sure the car was rather dead as well with its whole front end smashed in. Luckily the occupants were OK but clearly wished they had fitted some form of Llama bars to the front of their car.
Slowly we reached our destination, and with that the ques to the petrol stations became longer and longer. It was misery having to wait at least half an hour to get filled up to then be told they had just run out anyway. Every now and then we would reach a station with no que, where I can only liken the feeling of joy at not having to que as a similar feeling one gets when you actually find a Ginsters pepper steak slice for under one pound in a UK petrol station. Sheer joy, I'm sure you will all agree, but sadly becoming a rare find!
After 4 nights in a tent with no shower and a chain which was literally falling off the sprockets, we arrived in BA. What a relief to be here, first things first I had a beer, or course. Then met up with Irish Kev, the man who liked crashing into hedges way back in Peru. Interestingly he decided to crash again in Peru post bike repair, but he is fine and is now here waiting, yes you have got it, more repairs and more BMW parts!
I now find myself unsure of what to do for new year but hanging out with an Irishman and a Welshman, we have yet to find the Scot though, but Ill make a point off approaching every pasty looking male in a street fight tonight, and ask him if he is Scottish and would he like to join us.
But until then I have cleaned the beast and fitted new sprockets and chain. I even have a buyer lined up, so seriously if anyone can think of a good reason why I shouldn't sell, and bring the beast home then this is your chance to persuade me.
Thanks EVERYONE for following my progress, it has been and epic trip, and I have so many lame stories to tell my friends in the pub at home they will hate me. (At last I can put the badger story to bed boys!)
Finally a huge thanks to everyone who has helped me out over the past 7 months and 1 day from leaving Anchorage to arriving in BA. There are too many people to thank so don't cry if I forget you, but thanks to everyone who let me stay for free at their place, including Don and Kirsten in Smithers, of course Jeff and Danial in Victoria (Ill be waiting for you both to show up in England soon!). Random man in Oregon, the Hodder family in Seattle, Kats friends, and how can I forget Bob and Jon! San Fran Bob, the T-shirt is still with me mate, and its the cleanest one I have! cheers buddy.
Also great to have met the boys at flying, I think I have forgotten how now so I shall expect free lessons soon (yeh right) Sierra I hear you finally have a job where you need to get out of bed before 4pm. Life's a bitch hey! Tim I made it mate, and I even stopped once or twice for a piss and a spot of food. I'm sure you owe me a pint when I get back, and I told you the KLRs rule.
Michael thanks so much for the hospitality in Costa Rica, it was nice to see the place, watch us win at rugby with a fellow Brit and dry out after being wet for 3 weeks!
Salvador and Guido thanks so much for having me stay when I rocked up out of nowhere. It was great to hang out and I think you should come the the UK very soon so as I can fill you with warm English beer with bits floating in it.
I never thought I would be saying this, but also a huge thanks to Kawasaki for all their help. Especially Kawasaki CIDEF in Santiago. Rodrigo and everyone there, thanks so much. I would have been stuffed without your help.
Well there we go, I hope I haven't forgotten anyone, if so I'm sorry. I have to say another huge thanks to everyone who has donated towards my trip, it really did make it possible to continue, you should feel proud, its not often you see such generosity. And finally thanks to all the people who have been reading my site and keeping an interest in the trip. Its great to know someone is reading it, and as I said it feels even better that Ive managed to use up some of your boring day at work. Africa shall hopefully be next.
THANKS EVERYONE!!!!! and happy new year and a that crap.
Simon
Until next time..........
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